Where are you right now with your thoughts? Are you really fully present in the present moment? Or is your mind perhaps stuck in the past and in “what if…” or “would I rather have…” loops? However, it is very important to free yourself from thoughts and musings about your past. Because once this veil of fog that clouds your present perception is lifted, you will realize how wonderful and fulfilling your life already is. With more clarity and mindfulness for the here and now, more of the inner contentment you long for will automatically arise.
TRY TO FOCUS ON THE ACTIVITY YOU DO NOW
In addition, the researchers had the subjects rate how low or high their feeling of happiness or satisfaction was at that moment and what activity they were doing at that moment. If your mind is wandering, it’s not contributing to your being happy. Why? Because it is not occupied with the present, with the here and now. Even if you are playing Mason Slots Casino for five minutes, try to focus on it and enjoy the gambling process.
The big question that arises: why on earth do you rummage around in your past over and over again, even though this is anything but good for you? If you take a closer look at the nature of such brooding thoughts, you will notice that they are mostly recurring. That they revolve around the same theme over and over again.
LET YOURSELF HAVE ANY FEELINGS
It is important that you give space to the thoughts and feelings that come up. What do you have to do concretely? Is there something to mourn? Then do it! Allow your pain and take time to see what is sad. Only if you allow negative feelings (which are just as much a part of life as positive ones), can you succeed in overcoming them.
Let’s say you blame yourself for breaking up with your ex-partner too soon. You ask yourself over and over again if you could have somehow worked it out. When you saw him with his new girlfriend last week, you felt a real stab in the heart. But instead of admitting your feelings, admitting that this hurts you a lot and that you still have feelings for your ex-partner, you rather rush from one date to the next. Only when you recognize something painful for what it is, can you leave it behind.
So, If you want to leave something behind, it is important to say goodbye to it properly. It’s not for nothing that there are funerals that are supposed to give you exactly this space of saying goodbye and mourning.
TRY TO FORGIVE YOURSELF OR OTHER PEOPLE
If you have a scenario, a person in your mind, who has hurt you very much and you still have to nibble and hold on to. Or an accusation that you have been harbouring and nurturing towards yourself for a long time. To forgive yourself or other people try to look at the situation from another point of view.
So, if you have once identified the behaviour you want to change in the future, don’t fall through the cracks and get too eager to make the changes. For many people, trying to change everything at once will only lead to them having insane difficulty maintaining their changes over the long term. Instead, always start small, and remember to start with small but meaningful changes so that you don’t fall prey to your old vices again at a later date.
When you realize that you’re getting in your own way again because you’re not meeting your deadlines or failing to follow through on your plans, refocus on putting some distance between yourself and your goals and start looking again for small but meaningful change opportunities that can put you back on the course to success.
If it happens to you more often that you are disorganized or lose track of things in the hustle and bustle, then it would be advisable if you take five minutes of your time every morning to create a to-do list that will serve as your guide. And if self-sabotage makes you to stressed, it may be a good idea to seek a psychologist.